


Evermore

by Antarctic_Echoes



Series: Luciferian Fics (One shots) [33]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: "Let's Wing It!" Fic Exchange, F/M, Fluff, God is a dork, Hurt/Comfort, Winged Lucifer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-16
Updated: 2017-08-16
Packaged: 2018-12-16 07:20:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11823885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Antarctic_Echoes/pseuds/Antarctic_Echoes
Summary: Lucifer returns from the desert with his new wings.  Things take an unexpected turn when he tells Chloe who he really is, so he flies to Heaven to make things right again.For the "Let's Wing It" Fic Exchange.Post S2x18 fic -- very long one-shot.





	Evermore

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Praemonitor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Praemonitor/gifts).



> This is for the "Let's Wing It" Fic Exchange. My prompt was the song "Evermore" by Josh Groban from Praemonitor. Video embedded below.  
> Lyrics: https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/joshgroban/evermore.html
> 
> Praemonitor, I hope you enjoy this story! It got a little longer than I was expecting.... Oops! :)
> 
> Special thanks to titC for helping me get out of my writer's block. <3 You are awesome!
> 
> This has not been betaed so I apologize in advance for all mistakes.
> 
>  
> 
> Disclaimer: Lucifer Morningstar, Chloe Decker, Mazikeen, Amenadiel and Linda Martin are owned by Vertigo Comics, DC Comics, Neil Gaiman, Mike Carey, and everyone else involved with the Lucifer TV show and comic books. "Evermore" is written by Alan Menken and Tim Rice and is owned by Disney. I own nothing and make no money on this. I merely am borrowing the characters and the song for... uh... writing practice. Original characters Raphael and Hadraniel are mine.

 

 

 

 

When Lucifer awoke in the desert, sun-baked to a crisp like an overbaked Thanksgiving turkey, he was not amused.  Oh no, he was furious.  To find himself the victim of a horrible bad joke -- not the getting knocked out part, but rather the bloody wings -- was enough to have him screaming every foul epithet he could think of at his father.  Not that dear old Dad cared -- he was probably staring down with a mocking smirk, the bastard.

He didn’t know who had knocked him out, and oddly enough, he didn’t care.  He could figure that out later.  Right now, the only thing that was important to him was getting back to Chloe, to whom he had promised to tell the truth.  If he didn’t get back to Los Angeles, he’d be breaking his word -- and he couldn’t have that.  No... no more going backwards.  Even though he feared she would either go insane or shoot him, he wanted -- needed -- to tell her the truth.  How could he hope to have her complete trust and friendship if he kept secrets from her?  Hiding was no longer an option, for she meant more to him than anyone or anything in the world.  Her opinion was the only one that mattered.

Not that he would ever tell her that he wanted more than friendship -- oh, no.  Dad had insured there could never be anything between them than just that, thanks to his bloody meddling.  But at times, late at night, alone in bed when the world was asleep, Lucifer had fantasized of a future with just the two of them together, happy in their own little world.  He didn’t dream of sex --  just warm hugs and cuddling -- which puzzled him since he loved doing the naked tango between the sheets, but the images in his head were wonderful, nonetheless.  The dreams of merely sitting on the couch with her, an arm slung around her shoulders as he watched her watch television, filled him with such longing that sometimes he woke up with tears in his eyes.  

Since warmth and kindness were things he had never experienced from his family, he had been confused and fascinated by her vast capacity to love, at first.  Then, as time went by, he found himself craving her attention, her warmth.  Her enormous compassion drew him to her like a magnet.  Even though he knew she made him vulnerable and that he should stay away from her, he couldn’t.  She was his addiction, more potent than any drug, any drink, anything he had ever taken in his infinitely long life.  The truth was simple -- he just couldn’t live without her.

And now that wanker of a dad had tried to ruin his confession to the detective by giving him back his wings!  Bloody hell, he had no idea what that tosser was up to, but he had no doubt it wasn’t anything good.  

Cursing under his breath, he took a few steps onto the hot sand, then flexed his wings.  It had been a while, but he had every confidence in the world that he could fly.  The limbs felt all right... sort of.  They felt... different.  Chalking it up to his imagination, he took a deep breath.  He felt exhausted, beat up, burned and just wretched overall, but he could do this.  He knew he could.  Flapping his wings, he leaped into the air,  tried to fly...

... and found himself completely out of control as he face-planted into a Joshua tree, tore free of its branches, zipped up in the air, hovered for a moment, then crashed into the rough ground in an explosion of sand.

Pulling himself to his feet, he looked over his shoulder with bewilderment at his unruly wings. What the bloody hell was wrong with them?  It was as if they didn’t even belong to him!

Dusting himself off, he launched himself into the air again and immediately careened left, then right, then shot up into the sky before slamming into the desert floor once again.  With a groan, he picked himself up and cursed.  Something was very, very wrong.  Right -- this time he’d stay grounded and watch his bloody wings.  As he started to move his new appendages, he glanced back at them.  With horror he saw that his idiotic wings were vibrating as fast as a hummingbird’s, giving off a loud hum like a gigantic bumblebee.  It was appalling.  He never had this problem before!  In the past he soared like an eagle -- graceful, majestic, stately, beautiful to behold -- not like some frantic, hyper June bug on too much caffeine!

“You son of a bitch!” he yelled at the sky.  “You bloody wanker!  Is this your idea of a joke?”

Of course, there was no answer.

A loud thumping echoed in his ears as his head throbbed painfully.  Rubbing his temples, he took a deep breath and let it out slowly.  Getting angry wasn’t going to get him out of this situation -- at least, not yet.  First things first -- he had to learn how to use his silly wings and get back to Chloe.  Then he’d fly right up to the Silver City and punch dear old Dad in the face.

Maybe if he moved really slowly, he could fly properly...?  Flexing his feathered limbs, he gave them a little shake.  The motion immediately set them off, causing them to flutter so quickly they were practically invisible.  Throwing up his hands, Lucifer rolled his eyes, right before his wings suddenly pulled him off his feet, yanked him upward and threw him all over the sky with no control whatsoever.  Before he knew it, he had smashed back into the ground again.

Spitting the sand out of his mouth, he glared up at the cloudless blue sky.  No doubt Dad was laughing his head off.  The fallen angel’s hands curled into fists as he lay there for a moment, imagining all the wonderful torture he would do to his father, before he pulled himself to his feet.  He’d learn to control his wings -- no matter how long it took.  

A week later, after a particularly abusive stint in the desert, he finally made it back home.  Flying with hummingbird wings was not easy -- Lucifer was so exhausted that all he wanted to do was curl up somewhere and sleep... but he pushed on.  He didn’t want Chloe to think he had gone back on his word, that he had abandoned her without explanation -- no, he’d never do that to her again.  He _had_ to get back and explain.  Surely she would understand...?

Never before had he been so relieved to see the night lights of Los Angeles spread out below him like a carpet of glowing jewels.  Getting the hang of flying with his new wings had been a harrowing experience, but he finally had enough control to navigate without looking like an out-of-control rocket.  His landings still left something to be desired, though -- he crashed onto the balcony of the penthouse, rolling in a jumble of limbs until he finally came to rest against the wall of his home.

For a moment he lay there, unable to move.  The tile under his cheek felt reassuringly smooth -- no rough sand here!  The damp night air from the marine layer touched his sunburned skin like a salve, soothing his insides, and assuring him he was not dreaming.  The sound of the cars far below him, honking as careless drivers took chances, was music to his ears.  Ah, bliss.  He had made it home.

“Lucifer!”  Strong hands hauled him to his feet.  Amenadiel.

Beyond exhausted, he couldn’t talk, couldn’t speak.  His big white wings dragged on the floor uselessly as his brother wrapped an arm around his waist and navigated him into the penthouse. Supporting his dead weight, Amenadiel half-carried him into the master bedroom.  Lucifer fell facedown on to the bed with a sigh.  Silk sheets had never felt so good.  Before he knew it, he was asleep.

 

 

________________________________________

 

 

“You look awful -- other than the wings.  Where have you been?”

Lucifer stopped shoveling the omelette into his mouth as he glanced at Amenadiel.  “Out in the Mojave -- courtesy of dear old Dad, I’m sure.”  Reveling in the taste of real food -- well, if one could call his brother’s cooking food -- he didn’t bother to swallow before answering.  Usually he had better table manners, but he was so hungry!  He hadn’t eaten in a week, and flying with his bloody hummingbird wings had completely sapped his reserves.

But oh, it was so good to have the pleasantries of modern life back!  When the morning light had awoken him, he had feared he was hallucinating in the desert -- but no, the silk sheets felt reassuringly real.  The sensation of cool water from the shower on his burned skin had nearly made him pass out in ecstasy, and ahhhh, the whisper of silk as he pulled on his designer Armani dress shirt and suit was a glorious symphony.  It was good to be back home.  

Grabbing a slice of toast and jamming it into his mouth, he said as he chewed, “He’s a bloody arse.”

His brother frowned as he set his fork down and leaned on the dining table.   “Why do you say that?  He gifted you with a new pair of wings... even though _I’m_ still the favorite, you know.”  He gloated for a moment while Lucifer glowered at him, before he grew serious again.  “You should be thankful --”

“Thankful?  Hah.”  The fallen angel swallowed his toast, washed it down with Scotch, then poked at the omelette with his fork. “You must be joking.”

“How can you say that, Luci?  I mean, come on -- you have your wings back.”

Lucifer slammed his fork on the table.  “I cut the bloody things off for a reason! And now he has the _gall_ to give them back to me?!  What’s his motivation?  How is he trying to manipulate me now?”

The big angel across from him sighed and rolled his eyes.  “You need to stop thinking that everything Father does is bad.  I’m sure it’s nothing like that --”

“Don’t give me that!  The bastard is always trying to twist me around, and I’ve had enough!”

“Has it occurred to you that maybe Father was thanking you for sending Mom away?  Can’t you just see the wings for what they are -- a gift?”

“A gift?”  Lucifer snatched up his fork again and stabbed his eggs.  “A _gift._  Right.  You have no idea the pain these wretched things have caused me.”  As he stuffed another piece of omelette in his mouth, he glared at his brother.  “The bloody bastard has turned me into a laughingstock.”

Amenadiel’s brows furrowed.  “What do you mean?”

Shaking his head, Lucifer concentrated on his food.  How could he tell his brother about his hummingbird wings?  Amenadiel would laugh so hard he’d give himself a hernia.  No, he wasn’t about to show him the fluttering horror his wings had become.  “Doesn’t matter.”

His brother studied him for a moment, then leaned back in his chair.  The silence stretched on until he finally said, “Chloe’s been worried about you, you know.”

Lucifer glanced up, then back down at his plate as his insides churned.  The food suddenly tasted like sawdust, so he shoved his chair away from the dining table and got to his feet.

The angel looked at him.  “Everyone was really worried when you just vanished, but especially -- where are you going?”

Slinging on his jacket, the Devil headed for the elevator.  “There’s something I need to do.”

“But Lucifer -- Lucifer!”  Amenadiel called after him.  Ignoring his brother, the fallen angel left the penthouse.

 

 

________________________________________

 

 

Lucifer stood in front of Chloe’s apartment door and shifted his weight from foot to foot.  Raising his hand to knock, he hesitated, then lowered it.  He had spent the last fifteen minutes standing on her doorstep, trying to work up the courage to talk to her.  What was he supposed to say?  When he had left the hospital a week ago, everything had seemed so clear: tell her the truth, show her his face, and grapple with her shock and revulsion.  But now with the wings, he didn’t have to show her the mangled ruins of his scorched body, did he?  He could reveal himself in a gentler fashion and hopefully keep her friendship.  Even though they could never be in a romantic relationship, that didn’t mean he couldn’t stay around her.  She didn’t need to know that he loved her with every breath he took.  So... how to go about telling her?

 _Hello, Detective. I have wings._  Too simple.

 _Hello, Detective.  I know I’ve been gone for a bit, but Dad played a horrible prank on me, and gave me wings._  No good -- it sounded like he had drunk a Red Bull.

 _Hello Detective. I’m the Devil.  I know I’ve been telling you for over a year, but now I have the wings to prove it to you.  Yes, I cut them off, but Dad gave me a new pair.  And before you say anything -- no, I am not into cosplay._  Nay, rambling like a bloody idiot was definitely _not_ the way to go.

Sighing, he rubbed the back of his neck.  It all sounded so terribly awkward and clumsy.  Perhaps he should go back to plan A -- just show his face to her... only he didn’t want to do that.  Just the thought of her fear and loathing made him cringe.  When she realized what a true monster he was, she wouldn’t want anything more to do with him, and he would lose his whole world -- and he definitely didn’t want _that._

Maybe he should just go home and think about it for another day?  That seemed like a sensible solution.  Yes, yes, he could do that. His partner didn’t know he was back -- he could tell her tomorrow....

But then Amenadiel’s words echoed in his head.  Chloe had been worried, and Lucifer knew he couldn’t put her through another day of waiting and worrying.  No, he had to do this.  Stiffening his spine, he took a deep breath.  He was the Devil, after all -- he had lived several millennia alone, scorned by both Heaven and Earth.  The revulsion of one more human would not make a difference.

And yet... this was Chloe.  His heart.  His soul.  Her opinion was the only thing that mattered.  If he could just navigate this landmine and tell her without triggering her fear and loathing, there might be some hope for him.

Repeating to himself over and over that he could do this, he rapped hard on the door before he could change his mind.  The seconds ticked by, stretching infinitely long, before the door finally swung open.

Chloe stood there, looking beautiful with her blonde hair loose and tousled around her shoulders, wearing a white blouse and comfortable jeans.  Lucifer’s breath hitched in his chest as a tightness grabbed a hold of his insides and squeezed.  Her aqua eyes widened and she gaped at him for a full minute before the shock slowly ebbed from her face, to be replaced by joy and relief.

“Hel --”  His voice broke.  Cursing his nerves, he cleared his throat and tried again.  “Hello, Detective.”

“Lucifer!” she breathed.  Warmth rushed through him at the sound of her voice, so welcoming, so... happy.  But even as he gazed at her, the kindness faded from her expression, to be replaced by suspicion.  Poking her head out the door, she glanced to the right and left of him.

Blinking at the sudden tension in the air, Lucifer looked right and left with her.  “W-what are you looking for?”

“Another wife.”

Pain shot through his heart at her words.  Even though the only way to give her back her freedom of choice had been to run off and get married, he had inflicted a terrible wound on her psyche by doing so.  Bloody hell, that one act would haunt him forever.  Wincing, he glanced down at the ground as shame filtered through him.  “No wife this time, Detective -- I assure you.”

As she eased the door open, she visibly relaxed and beckoned him inside.  “So where have you been?  I was worried sick when you didn’t show, and no one could find you....”  As he crossed over her threshold and closed the door, she leaned in close to him, studying his cracked lips, along with the cuts and bruises on his sunburned face.  “You... you look awful.  What happened to you?”

“Right.  I was the victim of a practical joke, and got dumped in the desert.”

“Dumped in the --” Chloe gasped before her face filled with anger.  “That’s not a practical joke, that’s kidnapping and assault.  You’re lucky you didn’t die out there.  Do you have any ideas who might have a grudge against you?”

He guided her to the couch.  “It isn’t important --”

“Yes, it is!”  She stopped him with a hand on his arm.  “Lucifer, someone attacked you.  We need to find out who --”

“Trust me, Detective, there are more important things to deal with right now.”  He gestured for her to take a seat.  “I have something to tell you.”

“But --”

“Please.”

All the fire left Chloe as she sunk onto the cushions.  “This is about the phone message you left, isn’t it?”

Nodding, he took a seat on the armchair adjacent to her.  “Right.  I _am_ sorry for the delay, but I do want to tell you... well, everything.  No more going backwards.”  Lucifer glanced around the apartment.  “Where is your little spawn?”

“At a friend’s house for a sleepover.”

“And Maze?”

“She called to say she was heading home from the hospital for a few things, then going straight back.  She should be here shortly.”

“Doctor Linda is still in the hospital?”  Lucifer’s stomach twisted and the blood rushed from his face.  “How... how is she?  Has there been any improvement?”

Chloe shook her head.  “Not much.  Her injuries were extensive.  She had some complications, but it seems she’s stable for now.”

Bowing his head, he bit his lower lip and pressed his eyes shut.  This was his fault... all his fault.  If she didn’t get better, he didn’t know what he’d do.  Why did he hurt everyone around him?

“Hey.”  Chloe’s voice brought him out of his self-recrimination.  “You okay?”

“Ah.  Right.”  He took a deep breath and tried to concentrate on the issue at hand.  “Let’s have our discussion.”  When she took a deep breath as well, Lucifer was surprised to hear a slight wheezing.  Frowning, he furrowed his brows as he studied her.  “D-Detective, are you all right?”

“Huh?”  She blinked at him before smiling.  “Of course I’m fine.  So... what did you want to tell me?”

“Right.  I... well....  What do you know about the Devil?”

Rolling her eyes as she leaned forward, Chloe planted an elbow on her knee and rested her chin  on her hand.  “Lucifer, don’t tell me you’re back to this Devil stuff again.  You’re not --”

“Please --” interrupted Lucifer as he held up his hand.  “Just bear with me, Detective.  Please.”  

Studying him in silence for a moment, she finally nodded as she straightened.  “Okay.”

“So... what do you know about the Devil?”

“Well... he’s a fallen angel who rebelled against God and got thrown into Hell.  Supposedly, he’s the root of all evil.  He’s usually depicted with bat wings, horns and a tail --”

A vein pulsed at Lucifer’s temple as rage ignited inside him.  “Bloody hell, Detective!  Look, I don’t have bat wings, horns and a tail -- I have _no_ idea how that goat rumor got started.  And I am _not_ the root of all evil.  You humans --”

Her mouth fell open at his reaction.  “You asked me what I knew!  Don’t complain when I answer your question!”

They glared at each other for a few seconds before the fallen angel took a deep breath.  “Right.  Yes... yes, of course.  I’m sorry, Detective. I have a hard time hearing about your ill-informed notions.”

She tilted her head at him as she furrowed her brow.  “But what does it matter anyway, Lucifer?  You’re not the Devil.  You have to stop thinking that.  You’re a good man.”

His heart thumped painfully in his chest at her words, and he squeezed his eyes shut at the warmth coursing through his body.  Chloe was the only one who thought he was good.  The only one....  

“I’m not a good man, Detective.”  He pulled at the tightness at the back of his neck.  “There’s no easy way to tell you, so I’ll just come right out with it.  I _am_ the Devil.”

Chuckling, Chloe leaned back against the backrest of the couch.  “You know I don’t believe that.  You can call yourself a monster or whatever you want, but I’ll never believe that of you.  That’s not who you are.”

Would she go insane when she knew the truth?  A chill ran down his spine.  He hoped not -- she couldn’t, could she?  Lucifer’s mouth tightened as a kaleidoscope of butterflies gathered in his stomach.  “Yes, Detective, it is -- and I have proof.”  He stood, shucked off his jacket, and started unbuttoning his shirt.

“What the hell are you doing?” Chloe cried as she rose as well, reaching out to still his hands.

Her light touch sent the butterflies winging throughout his insides.  How he longed for her to hold onto him, keep him steady....  But no.  Closing his eyes, he struggled to memorize every feel, every nuance of her fingers against his hands.  If he didn’t do this properly, it would be the last time he’d see her -- he was sure of it.  His hands were gentle as he set her apart from him.  “Don’t worry, Detective.  It’s just my shirt.”  A crooked smile touched his lips.  “You won’t have to view my naked splendor... unless that is what you desire.”

As he pulled off his dress shirt, he heard her gasp, and glanced up to see her wide eyes studying the burns and peeling skin on his chest.  She grimaced with sympathy.  “Oh Lucifer....”

Her soft words filled him with hope.  Perhaps if she felt sorry for him, the shock of what he was wouldn’t be so bad?  Surely she would understand and accept him...?  His stomach flip-flopped as his heart clenched in his chest.  “Promise me... you won’t be scared.”  

“Scared?  Why would I be -- oh.”  Chloe’s eyes lit up with wonder as Lucifer opened and flexed his big white wings, the feathers catching the light and shimmering with a radiant iridescence.  “Oh my god....”

“Not Dad -- just me, Detective.  At least they aren’t bat wings.”  He tried to smile.  “Otherwise you’d have to call me Batman.”

“So, you’re really --”  The wheeze grew louder as she gasped and coughed.  “Oh god --”

“No, not --”  Lucifer broke off in alarm as he watched Chloe’s skin grow pale and her face fill with horror.  “Detective?”

Shaking her head, she stumbled backward, nearly tripping over the couch in her haste to get away.  The wheezing in her chest choked off as she gasped for air, and collapsed on the floor.  His heart beating furiously as the breath whooshed out of his lungs, Lucifer rushed to her, holding her trembling body in his arms.  

“Detective!”

She only shook her head as she clutched her throat, her eyes round with fear.  Her free hand beat at him, tried to push him away, but he held on, not knowing what was happening or how to help her.  The sound of the front door opening caught his attention, and he turned to see Maze walk in.

“Chloe, I -- what the hell?!”  She stood there, stunned, as she stared at Lucifer in shock.

“Maze, help me!  The detective --”

Curse words spewed out of the demon’s mouth as she rushed over and shoved the fallen angel away from Chloe.  “Goddamn it, Lucifer!  Put your wings away!”  Her eyes scanned the room as the choking woman gripped her arms tightly.  Pointing to Chloe’s purse, Maze ordered, “Get me her bag -- now!”

Lucifer scrambled to do her bidding, still confused but eager to help.  Leaping over the couch, he grabbed the purse and jumped back to Maze’s side, holding it out.  The demon ripped it out of his hands and upended it on the floor.  Digging through the contents, she finally found what she was looking for -- a plastic tube which held a strange, fat, pen-like device with a blue tip at one end and orange on the other.  Snatching it up, she popped the yellow lid off the tube with her thumb and slid the cylindrical contraption out.  “Get out,” she snarled at the fallen angel as she jammed the orange tip against Chloe’s leg and pushed the blue end. “Now, Lucifer!”

“But --”

“Do you want her to die?!   _Get out.”_

His heart pounding a mile a minute, he stumbled away, grabbing his shirt and jacket as he headed for the door.  As he turned the doorknob, he heard Chloe wheeze -- a far better sound than her choking -- and Maze reassuring her.  

“I’m calling 911, Chloe.  Don’t worry, he’s gone.  You’re going to be okay.”

Lucifer’s stomach churned as he ripped open the front door and threw himself across the threshold.  Saliva rushed to his mouth as nausea overtook him.  For a moment he thought he was going to vomit, but he swallowed hard and forced the bile back down.  Concentrating on putting one foot in front the other, he staggered like a drunk down the hall, away from the apartment.  He still didn’t know what had happened, but he did know one thing -- he had almost killed Chloe, and it was all his fault.  

 

 

________________________________________

 

 

Sitting at his piano in the penthouse, Lucifer mournfully plunked out a tune with one finger.  Chloe haunted him -- her horrified face, her hands frantically pushing him away, her eyes wide with terror as choking sounds came out of her mouth....  He cursed himself for having gone to see her.  Couldn’t he do anything right?  All he seemed capable of was hurting the ones he cared about.  If only he could toss himself over a balcony and actually die... but to do that he needed Chloe around, and one thing was for sure: he’d never see her again -- not after what happened.

And yet... how was he to survive without her?

Pinching the bridge of his nose, he wished things were different.  What had made her so sick?  Him?  Well, obviously it was him, but she’d never had a problem with him before -- not that it mattered anymore.  He didn’t dare see her again.  He’d rather go back to Hell than to put her in danger once again.

His fingers gliding over the keys, Lucifer started to pick out a tune, and before he knew it, “Evermore” filled the air.  Closing his eyes, he started to sing.

 _I was the one who had it all_  
_I was the master of my fate_  
_I never needed anybody in my life_ _  
I learned the truth too late_

Wasn’t that the truth?  Lucifer snorted in disgust.  If only dear old Dad hadn’t played God -- well, Dad _was_ God so he couldn’t help being a manipulative bastard, but did he have to throw Chloe in his path?  He had been so happy until he met her....

No, that wasn’t true.  He hadn’t been happy -- he had been searching for something, only he hadn’t known what it was until he met her.  Chloe was the other half of his soul -- she completed him.  Meeting her had been like a ray of sunshine in the dark gloominess of his life.  He hadn’t really lived until he had fallen in love with her.

 _I'll never shake away the pain_  
_I close my eyes but she's still there_  
_I let her steal into my melancholy heart_ _  
It's more than I can bear_

He continued singing, even though the words filled him with agony as her horror-stricken face kept staring back at him in his mind’s eye.  How could he survive?  He loved her so much, and yet he could never be with her -- not that he could ever be with her, thanks to Dad, but he had hoped they could have at least continued working together, remained friends....

He laughed harshly.  Who was he kidding?  He was a monster, and would never be anything else.  He had been a complete fool to believe otherwise.

 _Now I know she'll never leave me_  
_Even as she fades from view_  
_She will still inspire me, be a part of_ _  
Everything I do_

Well, that certainly was true.  No matter where he went or what he did, Chloe would be a part of him, even though she was forever out of reach.  He’d never be able to share anything with her, bask in her presence, enjoy the sound of her laughter.  His eyes grew distant as he looked ahead to a future filled with his sweet memories of her, tormenting him for all of eternity.  If Dad had wanted to punish him, he had chosen the perfect and most cruel way to do it.

 _Wasting in my lonely tower_  
_Waiting by an open door_  
_I'll fool myself she'll walk right in_  
_And as the long, long nights begin_  
_I'll think of all that might have been_ _  
Waiting here for evermore!_

As the last notes of the song faded away, Lucifer’s vision blurred from the burning tears welling in his eyes.  Why had he sung that song?  It hit too close to home, caused too much pain in his soul.  With a snarl, he smashed his fists down onto the piano keys, filling the air with discordant noise.

He should have known that nothing but bad things would come out of telling the detective the truth.  Since when had anything ever gone well for him?  He was a fool, through and through.  With a curse he stood up, knocking over the piano bench in the process.  Stepping over the fallen seat, he strode over to the bar and grabbed the whiskey decanter.  Not even bothering with a glass, he took a long pull from the container, emptying it in one go.  As he lifted the crystal to throw it against the wall, the elevator dinged, stilling his movements.

Maze stepped out and raised an eyebrow at him.  Slowly lowering his hand, Lucifer found himself clutching the glass as he cleared his throat.  His chest tightened and his roiling stomach brought an onset of nausea as a horrible thought came to mind.  “The detective... is she...?”

“She’s okay -- she’s at the hospital.  They’ve got her under observation.”  Walking up to the fallen angel, Maze pulled the decanter out of his hands. “Give me that.  You’re going to shatter it.”

His hands suddenly boneless, he let her take the container away and watched her set it on the counter.  “What... what happened to her?”

Rage suddenly lit Maze’s eyes, and she poked his chest with her finger.   _“You_ happened to her, you idiot!”

His mouth fell open.  “Me?”

“Yes, you!  Dammit, Lucifer, she has a feather allergy!  You could have killed her!”

Lucifer’s blood ran cold.  So that’s what had happened -- she had a severe allergic reaction to him... his wings.  Bloody hell, she could have died in his arms, and he would have been helpless to stop it.  If Maze hadn’t arrived, Chloe might have....  His legs suddenly went out from under him and he stumbled before gripping the bar counter to right himself.  “A feather...?  But....”  His brain struggled to understand what he was hearing.  “But... she didn’t have one before, when my wings got stolen --”

Maze rolled her eyes.  “Because she developed it after her bout with poison!”  She jabbed her finger even harder into his chest.  “And if you hadn’t _run off_ to Las Vegas like a fricking _idiot,_ you _would have known that!”_  Huffing angrily, she crossed her arms in front of her.  “I had to get rid of all my feathered sex toys because of it!  We had to get the apartment specially cleaned, and then you come along and spread your stupid wings all over the place and --”

‘How was I to know?!”  A roaring filled Lucifer’s ears as his heart pounded in his chest.  “You should have told me!”

“When?!  You were too busy plotting your mother’s downfall to talk to me!”

For a long moment they glared at each other, before Lucifer’s eyes fell away.  His shoulders slumped as he rubbed his forehead, then ran his hand over his face.  “You’re right, of course.  I should have talked to you.  I should have....”

Turning away, he bit the inside of his cheek as self-recrimination flooded his insides.  He had been so filled with his own need for revenge against his mother and father, so busy with his own plans, that he hadn’t bothered to ask about the detective or talk to Maze.  What kind of a Devil was he, that he couldn’t even inquire about the one he claimed to love more than anyone else in the world?

_The worst kind._

As Maze approached him, her face gentled and she laid a hand on his arm, but the fallen angel threw it off, then backed away.  He didn’t deserve kindness, sympathy, or even pity.  No.  He was a horrible, wretched excuse of an angel who had no business being anywhere near anyone, least of all the detective.  All he did was hurt the ones he loved, destroyed everyone around him.  Dad had been right to throw him into Hell -- he had no business being anywhere else.

“She wants to talk to you,” the demon said quietly.

A bitter laugh spewed out of Lucifer.  “Talk to me?  Right.  I’ll end up killing her.”  He stalked over to the piano and righted the overturned bench.  “No, it’s best if I don’t go anywhere near her.”

Maze snorted.  “There is such a thing as a phone, you know.”  When the fallen angel said nothing, the demon headed back toward the elevator.  “Well, I’ve delivered her message as I promised.  Now I have to get back to Linda.”  As the doors closed, she called out, “Don’t be an ass, Lucifer.  Talk to Chloe.”

 

 

________________________________________

 

 

Lucifer had to admit that the hummingbird wings did come in handy for one thing: hovering.  With his old wings he would have had trouble, for he would have needed a brisk wind to hover, and there wasn’t one here.  Hidden by the moonless night and the shadow of the trees next to Chloe’s fourth floor hospital room, he beat his wings as he paused by her window and peered inside.  

Now that visiting hours were over, she lay in bed with the lights off, but a little nightlight near her head dimly lit up her features.  Her skin looked pale, and her face was drawn and sad.  He saw her hands fiddle with the phone resting on the blankets across her stomach.  Sighing, Lucifer fished his phone out of his pocket and dialed the detective.

He couldn’t hear through the thick glass, but he did see her face light up as she looked at the display, saw her fumble to answer before her voice, shaky and thin, sounded in his ears.

“Lucifer!”

Well, she didn’t sound like she hated him -- didn’t look like she did, either.  “Hello, Detective.”

Even though she didn’t know he was watching, he saw her struggle to a sitting position and run a smoothing hand over her hair.  “Hi.”

A long pause sat between them as Lucifer worried his lower lip with his teeth and wondered what to say.  “How do you feel?” he finally asked at the same time she said, “About this afternoon....”

They both broke off at the same time, and another awkward silence stretched out before Lucifer gave a little laugh and said, “Right.  Go ahead.”

“No, you first.”

“No really --”

Her chuckle in his ear sent little butterflies aflutter in his stomach.  “I’m glad you called,” she said.

Warmth set his insides aglow as his breath suddenly caught in his throat.  “Really?”

“Mm hm.  I wanted to talk to you about this afternoon.”

His face grew hot.  “I-I’m sorry,” he stammered.  “About everything.  Had I known about your allergy, I never would have -- I mean, I didn’t know, and --”

“It’s okay.”  Through the window, he saw her smile as she spoke into her phone.  “I’m glad you told me the truth and showed me your wings.  It explains a lot.”

“You... you don’t hate me?”  He cringed at how pathetic he sounded.

“Why would I hate you?”

“I almost killed you.”

“You didn’t know about my allergy.  I’m not going to hold that against you.”

Was he dreaming?  Surely he was dreaming.  “But -- but I’m the Devil.”

“You’re not -- you’re an angel.”

He snorted.  “A fallen one.”  He pressed his eyelids shut for a brief moment, blocking her figure from his view.  “The Devil.”

“No.”  Chloe’s voice was firm in his ear.  “I’ve had a lot of time to think about things.  You’re still the same Lucifer I know.  A good partner, a good man.  A kind man.  Not the Devil at all.”

Her words stunned him.  “But I punish people --”

“And you’re good at it, too.”

His mouth fell open.  He couldn’t understand why she was taking this so well.  “You should be terrified.  I’m the _Devil,_ Detective.  Even you said the Devil is evil --”

“But you aren’t.”  Her face grew stubborn.  “I know you, Lucifer.  I don’t care what you’ve done in the past, or who you used to be.  I know who you are _now,_ and the man I know is a good man.  Period.”

Tears stung his eyes.  He had never expected her to be so accepting of him.  Oh, he had hoped, but he had never imagined she would actually reject what the world thought of him....  “Detective....”

Her voice grew soft.  “I wish you were here.  I want to see you.  I know we can’t meet because of my allergy to your wings, but....”

Lucifer watched her through the glass, saw the regret on her face, and felt hope rise in his heart.  She wanted to see him!  Did this mean she still wanted him in her life?  “I’m here.  Look outside.”

Her eyes flew to the window where he hovered.  She squinted as she tried to see into the gloom, then her expression lit up brighter than the rising sun.  Scrambling out of bed, she grabbed the IV stand and pushed it beside her as she slowly walked over to where he was.

“Are you a peeping tom now?” she asked into her phone as she came to stand before him in her hospital gown.

He chuckled.  “Only for you.  Why don’t you turn around, so that I can see your --”

Her laughter cut him off.  “You’re an ass.”

A smile pulled at his lips.  “Thank you.”

Chloe stared at him with wonder in her eyes.  “I can barely see your wings.  You’re like a hummingbird --”

He winced.  “Right.  Please don’t remind me.”

“-- or Tinkerbell.”

A wave of horror washed over Lucifer.  “Detective, please!  I am not some pathetic little Disney fairy!”  Her joyous laughter washed over him like a healing balm and brought another smile to his lips, before his face grew somber.  “Detective, are you sure you can accept me?  I _am_ the Devil --”

“I can.”

“-- and I am very ugly.”  His eyes fell from hers as he looked away.  “This isn’t what I look like... not really. The real me is... hideous.”

“Lucifer, look at me.”  Chloe’s sharp voice brought his eyes back up to hers.  She placed her hand on the glass separating them, and spread her fingers wide.  “I don’t care what you look like.  You could be the ugliest man in the world and I wouldn’t care.  Looks don’t mean anything to me.  What matters is what’s inside.  Your heart is what matters, Lucifer... and your heart is beautiful.”

Speechless, he gaped at her as tears ran unchecked down his cheeks.  Had she really said his heart was beautiful?  She was the only one who ever saw the good in him -- the only one....  Lifting a shaking hand, he pressed his palm against the glass where her hand rested and matched her fingers.

“I wish I could be with you right now, without this window separating us,” he choked out.  “I wish you weren’t allergic to me.”

Her voice was sad when she answered.  “I wish so, too.”

Lucifer pressed his forehead to the glass.  If only she didn’t have a severe feather allergy!  How he longed to take her into his arms and never let her go.  Damn his father for ruining his chances of doing just that!  He couldn’t even work with her now.

Unless....

His heart suddenly pounding in his chest, he pulled back and gazed at her with excited eyes.  “Right.  Don’t worry, Detective, I’m going to fix this.”

Chloe blinked at him in surprise.  “How?”

“I’ll have Maze cut off my wings, and then we can work together again --”

“Don’t you dare!”  The vehemence in her tone nearly had Lucifer dropping his phone.  “I swear, if you cut off your beautiful wings, I will never forgive you!”

“But --”

 _“No,_ Lucifer.”

He pouted.  “But then how else can we work together?  Either you’d have to be like the Boy in the Plastic Bubble, or else I’ll have to work with you in a hazmat suit.”

Chloe’s lips quirked up into a crooked smile.  “I can’t imagine you in a hazmat suit.”

For a brief moment, a smile touched his face.  “Neither can I.”  His mouth tightened.  “I’ll find a way, Detective.”

Her eyes were sad.  “I want to work with you again, Lucifer, but not if it’s going to cost you your wings.  We’ll just have to say goodbye.  After all, it’s not as if we’re....”  She broke off as she looked away, and her hand fell from the glass to rest at her side.

Lucifer’s heart thumped painfully in his chest at her hurt expression.  No, they couldn’t be anything more than friends, but that didn’t mean he was going to let their friendship die, as well.  “I’ll find a way, Detective.  I’m not letting you go.”  Her eyes flew back to his as her mouth fell open with surprise.  Heat rushed into Lucifer’s face as he realized what he had said, but then he nodded firmly.  “Trust me, Detective.  I’ll find a way.”

 

 

________________________________________

 

 

Of course, finding a way wasn’t as easy as he had hoped.  All night long, he sat in his penthouse trying to think of what to do -- other than the easiest solution, which was to cut off his wings.  The only idea he could come up with was to see his brother Raphael, who was something of a prick.  He was, however, also the best healer in Heaven.  If anyone could fix Chloe’s allergy, as well as Linda’s wounds from Mum, it was him.  Lucifer decided to make the journey to see his brother and try to strike up a deal with him.  No matter what the cost ended up being, Lucifer would pay it, for he was adamant about helping both women and making everything right again.  

So, dressed to impress in his best suit, he took himself up to the Silver City.  His bloody hummingbird wings made short work of the distance; he quickly hid them from view as soon as he landed on the western edge of Heaven.  The thought of anyone seeing his flapping wings made him cringe in horror.  No need for everyone to see what a laughingstock Dad had made him.  Striding over the lush grass, he began the long trek toward the Western Gate.

It always entertained Lucifer to see television shows portraying Heaven as clouds and fluff and whiteness, when it was actually quite like Earth -- only more.  More magnificent, more untamed, more vivid with its oversaturated colors -- just... more.  When he was young, he had enjoyed leaving the city to roam the surrounding woodlands beyond, with its wild nature and overwhelming beauty... and the silence.  The silence had been glorious.  Well, at least when it wasn’t broken by other siblings making a ruckus... like now.

“Get back, Lucifer!  You are not allowed here!” the guard at the Western Gate yelled, pointing his spear at him.  “You’ve been banned and the gates are closed to you!”

The fallen angel rolled his eyes.  “Well of course they’re closed to me, you bloody prick, and I wouldn’t want to be back in that boring place anyway.”  He wondered if he could smack his brother upside the head.  “Right.  Look, Hadran, I’m just here on the outside, making a phone call, okay?  So just... chill.”

Hadraniel drew his brows down as he lowered his weapon.  “Why would I want to be cold?  There is no cold here in the Silver City.”

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Lucifer heaved a sigh.  His siblings were so hopelessly square....  “Right.  Nevermind.  Just... give me a moment and I’ll be on my way.”  Placing his hands together, he started to pray.

_Hellooooo, Rafe.  Your favorite brother is here to see you...._

No answer.  Frowning, Lucifer pursed his lips and tried again.

_Rafe?  Come on, bro, answer me.  I’m over by the Western Gate._

Still nothing.  

_You know I can’t come in...._

When there was still no response, Lucifer’s blood began to boil.  Taking a deep breath, he shut his eyes and prayed very loudly.

 _Bloody hell, Rafe!  Get your sodding arse out here_ now _before I yank Hadran’s spear away from him and stick it so far up his arse that even you wouldn’t be able to remove it!_

“No need to yell, you ass, I’m not deaf,” Raphael snapped as he approached and looked at Lucifer through the gate.  Dressed in simple, coarsely spun robes, he looked nothing like some of the other siblings who enjoyed their finery.  “What can I do for you?”

The fallen angel shifted from foot to foot.  “Can you come out here?”  He shot a glance at the guard, who eyed him with suspicion.  “Where we can talk.”

“Sure.”  The healer turned to his brother.  “Hadraniel, can you please open the gate?”

The guard glanced at Lucifer, then back at Raphael, his face full of indecision.  “But... but he’s the Fallen One.  I’m not supposed to --”

“You’re not letting him in, you’re letting me out.  Now come on.”  

“I have my orders --”

The healer rolled his eyes.  “And you’re not disobeying them.  We go in and out all the time --”

“But not when _he’s_ right outside!”

“It will be fine.  Lucifer’s not a bad sort, trust me.”  When the guard still didn’t move, Raphael elbowed his brother in a friendly manner.  “Come on.  I’ll take full responsibility if it’s not, okay?  Now let me out.”

Biting his lower lip, Hadraniel cast another look at his fallen brother, who tried to look as innocent as possible.  “If you really think it’s safe --”

“I do.  Come on.  Open it.”

Frowning, the guard unlocked the gate and pulled it open just wide enough for Raphael to slip through.  With a large clang, it slammed shut behind him.  The chestnut-haired angel looked at his fallen brother with raised eyebrows.

“Right,” Lucifer said.  “This way.”  He led his brother through the woods.

Raphael followed close behind.  “Why didn’t you go to the main gate instead of coming up to the western one that’s hardly ever used?  You know that’s just going to make everyone paranoid.”

The fallen angel shrugged.  “Let them be paranoid.  I have no intention of returning to that wretched place.”

He heard his brother chuckle behind him.  “Same old Luci.  You still don’t care about anyone else’s opinion, do you?”

 _I don’t give a damn about what_ anyone _thinks_ sat on Lucifer’s tongue but remained unspoken, for it wasn’t the truth.  He did care, actually -- he cared a great deal about what Chloe thought.  His insides clenched at the thought of the detective, and suddenly he found himself at a loss for words.  Luckily they had just reached a little clearing.  

“Ah, here we are,” he said as he looked at the healer with a smile.  “A nice place to chat.”  He gestured to a large rock by a babbling stream.  “Have a seat.”

Raphael remained on his feet as he studied his brother.  “I assume this has to do with your wings.”

Lucifer’s heart stopped for a split second before thumping painfully in his chest.  “What do you mean, ‘my wings’?”

“Father had me heal you after Michael dumped you in the desert --”

“You?!   _You_ did this to me?”  A bright red glow lit the Devil’s eyes as he jumped his brother and punched him in the face.

Blood spewed from Raphael’s mouth as his head snapped back and he fell to the ground.  The healer gaped at his fallen brother.  “Dammit, Lucifer, what did you do that for?!”

Grabbing a fistful of his robes, the fallen angel hauled him to his feet.  “You bloody wanker!”  He punched his brother again, this time in the eye.

Reeling away, Raphael struggled to stay on his feet.  “Luci, what in the world --”

“Thought it was right funny, did you?”  He grabbed the angel and shoved him hard.  “Let’s all stand around and laugh at our pathetic fallen brother!”  The Devil tackled his opponent and bared his teeth as he straddled him.  “I thought you were better than the others, but I guess I was wrong --”

“What are you talking about?!”

“The bloody hummingbird wings, you tosser!” snarled Lucifer as he pummeled his brother’s face.

Raphael struggled to protect his head, holding up his arms to block his brother’s blows.  “That wasn’t my idea, you ass!”

The Devil faltered as the red glow faded from his eyes.  “It... it wasn’t?”

“No -- it was Father’s!”  Raphael shoved at Lucifer.  “Now get off of me!”

Lucifer reeled at the information.   _Oh, shite._  His stomach twisting into knots, he pulled himself up and held out a hand to help his brother, but Raphael slapped it away and scrambled to his feet.  “Rafe --”

The healer held up his hand, which shook slightly.  “Don’t.  Just... don’t.”  Taking a seat on the rock, he touched his face gingerly.

The fallen angel threw his arms up.  “Well, why didn’t you say it was Dad in the first place?”

“You didn’t give me the chance.”  Raphael spat the blood from his mouth and refused to look at him.

Long minutes ticked by as Lucifer stood before the healer, fidgeting with his cufflinks.  Damn his temper!  Had he completely destroyed his one chance at getting help for Chloe and making things right again?  The blood rushed from his face, and coldness settled in his bones like a killing frost.  If he had blown it with Rafe, he’d never forgive himself....

When Raphael finally looked at his brother, his eyes had lost their anger, and he sighed.  “Look, I get why you’re angry.  I warned Father it wasn’t a good idea, but he wouldn’t listen.  He said you’d need the extra speed to get back to Los Angeles.”

Lucifer sank down onto a nearby rock.  “Was it his idea to dump me in the desert?”

“No.”  The healer wiped the blood from his face with his sleeve.  “That was Michael.  He was angry when he saw what you did to Mother -- said it wasn’t fair that he didn’t get a chance to talk to her before you sent her away.  Father was... relieved, I think.  He said he wanted to reward you in some way.”

“So the wings were to thank me for Mum?”

Raphael nodded.  “I think so.  Plus he wanted to be helpful.  He said they would make your life easier.”

“Easier.”  Lucifer snorted with derision.  “Right.  If Dad thinks the new wings have made my life easier, he’s away with the fairies.”

His brother smiled at that.  “Father tries his best.  His intentions are good, but the execution often leaves something to be desired.”

“Hmph.”  The Devil tossed his head.  “He’s an idiot.”

Raphael chuckled.  “Well, he definitely can be a dork, at times.”  He waved at his brother.  “So... I’ll fix your wings and then I’ll let you be on your way --”

“No!”  The fallen angel’s vehement response had his brother blinking.

“But... isn’t that why you came?”

“No.”  Taking a deep breath, he tried to still his pounding heart.  “I... I need a favor.”

The healer raised his eyebrows but said nothing.  His silence set Lucifer’s insides quivering, and his mouth went dry.  “It’s important.  Believe me, Rafe, I’d never ask if it wasn’t --”

“What is it?”

Surprised by his brother’s willingness to listen, the fallen angel felt a surge of adrenaline.  “Right.  Two humans need your help.  One was hurt terribly by Mum -- I think that’s a good enough reason for a little divine intervention, don’t you?”

Raphael cocked his head.  “And the other?”

“The other....”  Suddenly unable to sit still, Lucifer hopped to his feet and paced a moment before he sat back down.  His knee bounced up and down as he tapped a finger on his leg.  “The other... is suffering terribly from a severe allergic reaction.  I need you to cure her allergy.”

For a long moment, the healer sat and studied him with assessing eyes.  “She’s important to you -- this human.”

Swallowing hard, he nodded as he wiped his hands on his trousers.  “Yes.”

Raphael gazed at him a few more seconds, then nodded.  “Okay.”

“Okay?”  Stunned, the fallen angel could only stare.

“Okay.”  The healer rose to his feet.  “Let’s go see these humans of yours -- but first, let me fix those wings.”

Lucifer hesitated, chewing his lower lip before blurting out, “That’s it?”

His brother dusted off his robes and lifted an eyebrow at him.  “What do you mean, ‘that’s it’?”

Rising to his feet, he waved his hand agitatedly.  “Right.  That can’t be it.  What is it desire from me?”

Glancing up, Raphael gawked at him.  “Desire?”

Lucifer nodded.  “Yes, desire.”  When the angel continued to look at him in confusion, he sighed and flung up his hands.  “No one does anything for me without wanting something in return.  So tell me... what is it you desire?”

His brother looked at him with sad eyes, then shook his head.  “You always did lump me with our brothers.  Not everyone is as selfish as you think.”

Puzzled, he cocked his head.  “What do you mean?”

“It means that I don’t want anything.  If you ask for my help, then I will help.”

Completely flummoxed, Lucifer didn’t know how to react.  Rafe didn’t want anything?  Nonsense -- _everyone_ wanted something.  Besides, he didn’t want to owe his brother.  Far better to keep this a business transaction than to be at the healer’s beck and call.  “But... surely you must want something?  I don’t want to be in your debt....”

“You won’t be.  We’re brothers -- consider it a gift.”  

A... a gift...?  He had never gotten a gift from his siblings.  They held him in the highest contempt, while he thought they were all a bunch of arrogant, self-righteous pricks.  And yet here was Rafe, giving a far more precious gift than he could ever know -- Chloe’s health.  Lucifer’s heart suddenly felt too big for his chest, and the back of his eyes stung at the healer’s words.  Quickly blinking back the tears, he told himself that it was merely dust in his eyes.  “That’s not right.  I should... I mean I have to....”

Raphael clasped him on the shoulder as he chuckled.  “Luci, stop being a dork about this.  Let’s get those wings of yours fixed, and then we’ll visit your humans.”

 

 

________________________________________

 

 

They saw Linda first, who was still in the Intensive Care Unit.  Raphael insisted on slowing down time, even though Lucifer told him that Linda knew about celestial beings.  His brother was a stick in the mud, though, and slowed time down anyway.  When they walked in, Maze sprung to her feet with her knives out, standing protectively in front of Linda’s bed.

Lucifer held up his hands.  “Easy, Maze.  We come in peace.”

She pointed with one of her knives.  “Who is he?  He’s not taking Linda!  I’ll slit his throat --”

“Oh, you haven’t met...?”  Lucifer glanced back at his brother, then at her.  “Well, he’s never visited Hell, so that’s understandable.  This is Rafe.  Rafe, my demon, Maze.”

The angel held out a hand to her.  “Nice to meet you.”

She stared at his hand until he dropped it, then sniffed disdainfully.  “So why are you here?”

“I’m here to help her.”  He pointed to the bedridden woman.  

“Rafe’s a healer, Maze.  Let him do his work.”  

A look of relief swept over the demon’s face as Raphael pulled up a chair next to Linda and took her hand.  Sidling up to Lucifer, she asked out of the side of her mouth, “How the hell did you get one of your fricking brothers to help you?”

A slight smile touched Lucifer’s lips.  “Oh, I have my ways.”

Maze studied the bruises on the healer’s face, then scowled at the Devil.  “Why didn’t you tell me you were going to beat him into submission?  Dammit, Lucifer, you never let me have any fun --”

A bark of laughter bubbled up within him.  “Don’t worry, I’ll be sure to call you the next time one of my siblings needs an arse-kicking.”

Maze gave him a look that clearly said, “You better,” before turning to look at the angel bent over Linda.  A soft blue light filled the room as Raphael’s hands glowed.  Devil and demon watched and waited silently as the healer touched Linda’s stomach where she had been injured by Mum.  As the minutes ticked by, the blue light grew stronger, brighter.  After what seemed like an eternity, the glow left Raphael’s hands and he straightened.  

“Well?” Maze demanded.

The healer turned to look at her, looking drawn and haggard, and gave a soft smile.  “She’ll be fine when she wakes up in a few hours.  All fixed.”

The demon slumped against Lucifer and took a deep breath.  Then she straightened.  “Yeah, well, your mom did this to her, so don’t expect me to thank you.”

Snorting, Raphael shook his head as he rose to his feet and stepped away from the bed.  “You’re certainly like Lucifer.”  

The demon got right into the angel’s face.  “And what’s that supposed to mean?”

“Maze, now is not the time,” Lucifer said as he took her arm and guided her over to Linda’s side.  “I think Doctor Linda needs you now.”

Maze’s face softened as she stared down at her friend sleeping peacefully.  “Yeah.  Okay.”  She sank into the chair the healer had just vacated, the two men already forgotten.

“Come,” the Devil beckoned quietly to Raphael and took him outside.  “There’s someone else who needs you.”

With time still slowed, the elevators were not working, so the fallen angel led his brother up the stairs to the fourth floor where Chloe’s room was.  As they stepped inside the darkened room, pain lanced Lucifer’s heart at the sight of her lying so still on the bed, hooked up to an IV as well as a machine with a frozen display.

“She has the severe allergy?” Raphael asked as they walked up to her bedside.

“Yes.”  Lucifer said in a strangled whisper as his eyes gently touched over her features.  The tightness around his mouth eased as his face grew tender at the sight of her.  Suddenly aware of his brother’s eyes on him, he turned and saw the shrewd look on the healer’s face.  “What?”

A strange, crooked smile touched Raphael’s mouth.  “She’s the one, isn’t she?”

Lucifer furrowed his brow as ice touched his insides.  “I beg your pardon?”

“You love her.”

His mouth dropped open as heat filled his cheeks, turning his face a bright red.  Luckily the room was dim -- hopefully Rafe couldn’t see how his words had affected him.  He forced out a laugh.  “And what makes you say that?”

“The way you look at her.  It’s as clear as day.”

Oh, bloody hell, was he that transparent?  Cursing under his breath, he squeezed his eyes shut as his voice grew harsh.  “Yes, well, it doesn’t matter, does it?  We can never be together.”

Raphael cocked his head at his fallen brother.  “Why do you say that?”

Lucifer pushed away from the bed and paced around the room, before finally stopping and waving jerkily at Chloe.  “Because Dad threw her into my path and took away her freedom of choice over whom to love --”

The healer squinted at him.  “Wait, what?”

Sighing heavily, the Devil scowled at his brother.  “Dear old Dad sent Amenadiel to bless her parents so that they could conceive.  He set her in my path and made her have feelings for me in order to manipulate me!”

“Made... her have feelings for you?”

“Yes.”

Raphael gaped at him.  “So you’re saying Father made her fall in love with you?”

“Yes.”

_“Father.”_

Lucifer rolled his eyes.   _“Yes._  You know how the manipulative bastard is always trying to run my life!”

For a long moment Raphael stared at his fallen brother, then he broke out into gales of laughter.  The Devil jerked his head back, then tipped it and glared at his brother through narrowed eyes.  “I fail to see what is so funny.”

“You are such an idiot!” the healer wheezed out between laughs.  “Father can’t make her fall in love with you!”

“Of course the bastard can --”

“No, he can’t!  Free will -- remember, Luci?  Humans have free will -- Father can no more make her fall in love with you than I can make two galaxies collide!”  As Lucifer gaped at him, Raphael got his laughter under control and walked up to him.  “Father gave humans the ability to choose.  If he could control their minds, don’t you think he would make them do his bidding?  But he can’t.  He gave them the ability to choose, to make up their own minds, to follow their own paths.”  He rested a friendly hand on his brother’s shoulder.  “Perhaps he tried to set you up on a date -- you know what a romantic dork Father is -- but that’s as far as he would have been able to get.  If your human has feelings for you, believe me -- they are her feelings alone.”

The blood rushed out of Lucifer’s face as his insides went cold.  So... so he had abandoned Chloe, hurt her, for no reason at all except that he had been paranoid? Got married and hurt his detective for nothing?  Cut his heart out of his own chest _for nothing?_  

Laughter spewed from his lips, harsh and tinged with madness.  He laughed long and hard before he rubbed his forehead and felt the burning in the back of his eyes.  Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath -- two -- before he glanced at his brother.  His face spasmed with pain, self-recrimination, and regret.  “I’m a bloody fool.”

“Yes, you are.”  Raphael glanced at Chloe.  “If you have feelings for her, and she for you, then don’t let this chance slip through your fingers.”  When he looked back at his brother, his face was sad.  “Believe me, Luci -- there is nothing worse than having a broken heart for all eternity.  Grab a hold of her, brother.  Hold onto her and never let her go.”

Stunned at the pain in his brother’s eyes, Lucifer could only stare helplessly at him.  “Rafe....”

With a rueful chuckle, the healer shook his head and slapped his brother’s shoulder.  “I’m a romantic too.  I want to see you happy.”  Turning away, he walked over to Chloe and picked up her hand.  “Now let’s get rid of this allergy of hers.”  

 

 

________________________________________

 

 

Lucifer sat by Chloe’s bedside as dawn slowly broke and a soft, golden light spilled into the hospital  room.  Raphael had assured him that the detective no longer had a feather allergy, and had even gone to the trouble of checking the rest of her health.  He had also healed all of her old scars, including the one from getting shot by Jimmy Barnes.  The fallen angel’s heart felt close to bursting when he thought of the kindness his brother had shown him and Chloe.

“Remember what I said,” Raphael had told him hours earlier, right before he left.  “Don’t let this chance for happiness slip through your fingers.”  And then he was gone.

“I won’t,” Lucifer whispered to himself as he recalled his brother’s words.

Just then Chloe stirred, and her eyes slowly opened.  The fallen angel leaned forward and studied her as butterflies took wing in his stomach.  No longer pale, her cheeks were a healthy pink and she looked well rested.

He let out a pent-up breath.  “Hello, Detective.”

When she smiled at him, his heart jumped as if it had been hit by a live wire.  “Hey.”

“How do you feel?”

A look of surprise touched her face as she sat up.  “Surprisingly well.”

“You’ll be happy to know you’re not allergic to me anymore.”

Chloe’s eyes widened as she blanched.  “You -- don’t tell me you cut off your wings.”

Lucifer chuckled.  “No, nothing so drastic.”

She let out a huge breath.  “So then... how did...?”

“Ah.  My brother Rafe helped out.  He healed your allergy.”

“Oh.  I’m glad.”  She exhaled slowly as her eyes shut for a moment, before she glanced around the room.  “Where is he?  I should thank him --”

“He went home, I’m afraid.”  Lucifer shot her a seductive smile.  “You could, of course, thank _me_ in his stead.”

The corner of Chloe’s mouth quirked up.  “Thank you.”

His smile widened to a wicked grin.  “Right.  You could show your appreciation as well -- you know, in a physical fashion.  Maybe a little naked cuddle time?”

Laughter burst from her.  “No, you ass.”

He chuckled before he grew serious.  Reaching over, he plucked her hand from her side and fiddled with it.  “Detective....”  

Her aqua eyes were filled with curiosity as they lifted to meet his.  “Yes?”

Goodness, how was he to tell her everything he felt for her?  How could he express how happy she made him, how she lifted him up and made him a better man -- or rather, Devil?  Words, usually so ready on his tongue, failed him and he lowered his gaze to her hand.  “I....”

Her voice was gentle.  “Yes?”

“Right.  I know things have been... well, awkward lately.  I’ve done some things I’m not proud of, and... I have many regrets.”  He rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb.  “But you know who I am now, and... I want to... I... was wondering....”  Taking a deep breath, he looked up and caught her eye.  “I know I hurt you, Detective.  That was never my intent.  You’re the last person I ever want to... that is, I was wondering....”

She cocked her head as she drew her brows down.  “What are you trying to say?”

“Right.  I was wondering if we might... hit the reset button?   You know -- start over?”

“S-start over?”  Her face was filled with puzzlement.

“Yes.  That is....”  He bit his lower lip and hoped he wasn’t going to make a complete fool of himself.  “Would you like to get a coffee later?  I mean, after you’re discharged, of course.”  At her surprised expression, he felt his stomach drop to his knees.  “Ah... right.  We don’t have to, if you don’t want to --”

For a long moment she gaped at him, then her face brightened and her eyes twinkled.  “I... I’d like to.”

It was Lucifer’s turn to be surprised.  “Really?”  

She nodded shyly as her cheeks turned a delicate pink.  “Yes, really.”

A matching pink touched the fallen angel’s face as warmth spread throughout his entire body.  All the breath left his lungs as he struggled to find words.  “Ah... right!  Right.  Lovely.”

Grinning like a fool, Lucifer squeezed Chloe’s hand, and felt a thrill all the way to his toes when she squeezed back.  Here was his chance -- a real chance to do things over, to do it right -- and he vowed not to muck it up.  Looking deep into her aqua eyes, he saw his future there, sparkling like the most beautiful star in the cosmos.  His face softened with everything he felt for her, and a tender smile touched his lips as he gazed at his heart’s desire.  His insides were so full of love he thought he would burst.

Looking deep within himself, Lucifer found an overwhelming joy within his soul that echoed the brightness of the rising sun.  The world suddenly seemed like a far better place than it had been the day before.  Gazing into his love’s eyes, he felt his heart take wing.

_I love you, Chloe....  Now, forever, always._

They still had a long road ahead of them before things could be perfect, but the Devil was truly happy at last.

 

 

 


End file.
